Want to live like Commons people?

Our house

We've got loads of rooms going in our massive shared house, right by the river, in the middle of London.

It's huge - literally palatial - so there's no shortage of space, although the roof does leak and it can get a bit draughty.

We share a kitchen, several kitchens in fact, and you'd have full access to the Robing Room and a cheap (I mean really cheap) bar. We've also got a big living room with loads of benches for when we want to have a house meeting, or watch Gogglebox (or just shout at each other). We're even filmed and put on telly sometimes - we shout louder then, especially at Ed.

We took it over from some guys called Tony and Gordon a few years ago and have been sharing it with a guy called Nick and some of his friends, but they're not sure they'll still be here after May and, to be honest, we'd be happy to see the back of them.

A guy called Nigel wants to move in but we're not too keen. He wants to make loads of changes and has insisted he can smoke in his room so I don't think it's going to work. Our mate Boris is hopefully coming to stay though - he's great, always up for a laugh, or just hanging about. He lives in a nice gaff right on the river by Tower Bridge at the moment but wants to come upstream to us instead. He's keeping the old place on for a year so won't be around full time - something to do with not being able to get out of his contract. He's bringing his Whiff Whaff table with him.

Here's the best bit - the rent is totally free, including bills. You even get expenses to cover some stuff (including having another house somewhere else - I know!). There's a whole team of cleaners so you won't have to worry about that either.

We're going to hold a vote to decide who gets in - kind of like the X-Factor but with fewer people taking part.

That's it!

It's available from May the 7th but it might take a couple of days (or weeks) to work out who's actually in and who gets which room etc

Looking forward to meeting you so I can talk to you about my ideas for a big society and George can explain our long term economic plan. Boris will most likely waffle on about his wacky scheme to build an airport on an island in the Thames and name it after himself - I told you, he's a fun guy!

Dave